Martian Days

Parliamentary remarks upon the 1898 Martian invasion of the United Kingdom and its territories

(Remarks of Prime Minister of Great Britain Robert Gascoyne-Cecil, 3rd Marquess of Salisbury, to the assembled House of Commons on the afternoon of June 8th, 1898)

Mr. Speaker,

Yesterday, the 7th of June 1898—a date which will live in infamy—the United Kingdom was suddenly and deliberately attacked by forces from the planet Mars.

These hostile entities, far from the reaches of our own world, have descended upon our nation with unprecedented ferocity. With their heat-rays and unspeakable machines, they have brought destruction to our towns and villages, sparing neither the innocent nor the defenseless. And the Foreign Office has informed me, just this morning, that the Martians have visited similar atrocities upon the peoples of France, of Germany, of Russia, of China, and of the United States. Truly, this is a war not simply with the British Empire, but a war between worlds.

This invasion was not a mere incident of interplanetary curiosity but a premeditated act of aggression. The Martians, devoid of the virtues and values we hold dear, have sought to impose their will upon the Earth, disregarding all notions of diplomacy, peace, and the sanctity of life.

I regret to inform you that the damages and casualties are severe. Our forces, though valiant, have found themselves in the gravest of circumstances, facing an enemy the likes of which we have never before encountered. This attack upon our sovereignty and our very civilization cannot and will not go unchallenged.

No formal warning was given, nor could it be, for these Martians, with their alien intellects and inscrutable designs, have shown no regard for the conventions of warfare or the principles of international law. This brutal act of war has brought us to the very brink, and it is our solemn duty to respond with the full might of the British Empire.

I ask that Parliament declare that since the attack by Martian forces on the 7th of June, a state of war has existed between the United Kingdom and the Martian invaders.

The resolve of His Majesty's Government is absolute. We shall defend our people, our homes, and our heritage from this dire threat. We shall marshal all the resources at our disposal, drawing strength from every corner of the Empire. And we shall not fight alone: the very Brotherhood of Mankind is engaged in this great struggle and struggle we shall till the end. We shall not falter in the face of this challenge, for our cause is just, and our spirits are unyielding.

With God's help, we shall prevail against this inhuman foe. We shall restore peace to our world, and we shall ensure that such an outrage against the Earth never again threatens our posterity.

May God bless our efforts, and may God save the Queen.

(a spontaneous singing of “God Save the Queen” and “Rule Britannia” followed)

The Why

I was recently reading President Roosevelt's legendary address to the Congress of the United States on December 8th, 1941. The above is an adaptation of the rhetoric, a tribute of sorts.

Reading Roosevelt's stirring words, I at first felt sad that the state of our political rhetoric has fallen so low. But I then reflected that we, the fortunate dwellers in the world's representative democracies, have never faced dangers as total as the threat that the fascist dictatorships posed at that time. Even the Communist countries were met with a Cold - though at times uncomfortably Warm - War.

Possibly the times called forth both the speeches, and the caliber of men (as I am thinking of Churchill too) who led our countries to such hard won victories. Reflecting on what great good fortune we had, in having leaders equal to the task, it is difficult not to nod in the direction of Providence, disreputable as the word has become among people who believe their fates are either entirely in their own hands, or subject only to the chaotic fluctuations of circumstance.